June 2, 2008

The Strangers (2008)



Just a poor man's version of "Ils" mixed with "The Devil's Rejects" plus proof, if any was needed, that Liv Tyler's face only has one expression no matter what situation she is in.
It's one cliché after another, lots of predictable jump scares (of which only the first one actually has any value), and it was just awful. I didn't care about the two main characters or what happened to them whatsoever.

Apart from several continuity errors (the biggest being the holes in the front door), everything was telegraphed so far in advance that the jump scares just fell flat and, because they were mostly based on loud sounds, it soon got annoying rather than frightening. That again was the biggest problem, it just wasn't scary.

I didn't find it very realistic either. The only credit I can give it is that the couple started out by not being the typical weaklings that usually get menaced in this kind of "home invasion" setup. But then they just got stupider and stupider and all the typical cliches started sinking in... running away and tripping, splitting up, investigating scary noises. The whole thing just showed complete contempt for the audience.

If you'd NEVER seen any other horror movie in your life then this wouldn't be so bad. But most people will have seen all the formulaic parts of this dozens of times before.
I'm not sure if this was a PG-13 but it certainly wasn't all that gory. There was blood but only as an aftermath. There wasn't a lot of on screen visceral action.

Also, there was no real sex or nudity. There was a moment when I thought Liv was going to get a knee trembler but it came to nothing. We were even cheated when she took a bath.

It just sucked. As one member of a group of teenagers said to the others as I was leaving the movie theatre, "That was the worst horror movie I've ever seen. I wish I'd watched Indiana Jones instead".

Don't waste your money watching this. Wait for the DVD then you can fast forward through it. I have never been so bored by a theatrical horror movie release in my life. 0 out of 10.

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