Contagion (2011)

"A thriller centered on the threat posed by a deadly disease and an international team of doctors contracted by the CDC to deal with the outbreak."

There are very few films that I have actually walked out of a movie theatre because of how boring they are but "Contagion" was nearly another one to add to the list. Although I did manage to endure this torture, I struggled to stay awake so much that I think that I've now given myself some permanent mental injury.

It's quite possible that every actor in this gave the most wooden, phoned-in performances of their entire careers. In fact, the only one to stand out was Kate Winslet due to her fake American accent. At least Gwyneth Paltrow's character had the good sense to die quite early on and save herself from further embarrassment.

Of course, the biggest problem apart from the film being all talk and no action was that there was nothing here that hadn't been done before but better in other virus films and TV series. The obvious ones such as the beginning of "Survivors" (1975) and the whole of "Outbreak" (1995) were simply far more interesting, better acted and, at the very least, original.

Due to the style of the film and the way that the plot shifted from one place to another, it was difficult to follow what was going on or form any emotional attachments, not that I've ever been the biggest fan of anyone involved in this anyway. Jude Law? Matt Damon? I'd rather watch an open tin of rice pudding go mouldy.

How did they manage to spend $60,000,000 making this boring crap? It was just a load of talk about a pandemic with a once big name cast who were completely wasted.