June 25, 2008

Dirty Sanchez (2007)



After the success of the Jackass boys, the Dirty Sanchez team probably thought it would be a good idea to make a movie. It wasn't.

This has none of the puerile humour of Jackass just a load of hit and miss self-mutilations which just make you think "Idiots!" rather than laugh either at them or with them.

They tried to give it a "Seven Deadly Sins" theme but it didn't really go that way. It was more "Seven Different Countries" and smacks of just being unedited highlights from the MTV series cobbled together quickly to compete with "Jackass: The Movie 2".

In Russia (for "Anger"), they paintballed a semi-naked Pritchard while getting him to believe he was setting a new world record. The idiot also got himself tattooed with the words "I love Johnny Knoxville" in Russian because he was too stupid to realise what it said! Oh how funny... not!

Pancho got spray painted green as the Hulk while he slept in a drunken stupor (for "Sloth") and, of course, in Russia they shaved his head and poured ketchup on it to make him look like Gorbachev. Oh how hilarious... again... not!

They went to Tokyo (for "Pride") and got beaten up by extreme wrestlers while rolling in broken glass, stayed in a rat infested hovel on some tourist island - Dominican Republic maybe (for "Envy"), judged a ladyboy competition in Thailand (for "Lust"), and for even bigger laughs gave Pancho liposuction. Of course, later Joycey had to drink the liposucked fat which came with the obligatory vomiting that you'd expect. Oh well, I suppose it's cannibalism, sort of.

The stupidest thing in the whole travesty was Pritchard cutting the end of his little finger off Samurai style with a cigar cutter in Tokyo. What a completely stupid thing to do. What entertainment was there in that? There was a lot of blood though!

I've forgotten the other locations now and have no idea what they did for "Greed". They did something in a desert (somewhere in America) eating insects or something which I suppose was for "Gluttony"... but we've seen it all before on "I'm a Celebrity get me out of here!" and "Fear factor" so it was all pretty lame.

None of this was remotely funny. It's all gone too far. What was originally stupidly masochistic and slightly gay entertainment has now turned into full on self-mutilation for money. It's not daring anymore, just ridiculous.

I wouldn't watch this if I was you. Jackass 2 is much better.

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