Nightlife (1989)

"A beautiful female vampire awakens after a hundred years of slumber to find herself in modern-day Mexico City, in this tongue-in-cheek thriller from director Daniel Taplitz."

Not to be confused with the zombie-comedy "Night Life" (with a two word title) from the same year, "Nightlife" is a made-for-TV vampire-comedy starring Maryam d'Abo, Ben Cross, and Keith Szarabajka.

As far as I know, "Nightlife" is not available on DVD, and although you will find it to watch online in all the usual places, the VHS version has become ridiculously expensive. For a low-budget TV movie which is only slightly above average, the price has obviously been driven up by VHS collectors rather than vampire movie fans. Having said that, there's still a lot to like about "Nightlife".

Dealing with the most obvious thing first, "Nightlife" has Maryam d'Abo in it only two years after her breakthrough role as a Bond-girl in "The Living Daylights". Although I don't have a "thing" for her, many people do, and she's certainly very attractive as the vampire Angelique.

"She's in better condition than my wife!"

The coincidence that there's also an Angelique (played by Lysette Anthony) in "Dark Shadows", and Ben Cross went on to play another vampire, namely Barnabas Collins, in the same 1991 TV series, won't be wasted on collectors of such trivia or vampire aficionados. As Vlad (no originality there!), Ben Cross delivers an often menacing and scenery-chewing performance, which clearly got him noticed and typecast as another vampire later.

Because "Nightlife" is a romantic-comedy at its core, Keith Szarabajka, who I've occasionally confused with a young Nick Nolte or even John Heard, plays Dr. David Zuckerman in a traditional yet occasionally comedic manner as he falls in love with his vampire patient. While not the most charismatic or heroic actor in the world (although he was great in "The Equalizer" TV series), he suits the part, and his chemistry with Maryam d'Abo mostly works.

Blurry VHS makes everyone look younger.

Having mentioned John Heard, "Nightlife" has a noticeable similarity to "Cat People" (1982), especially the relationship between Oliver Yates (John Heard) and Irena Gallier (Nastassja Kinski). Just replace Paul Gallier (Malcolm McDowell) with Ben Cross, and the "eternal triangle" is complete. I'm not saying that anyone copied anyone else here. The sexual rivalry is simply a standard element of most "rom-coms".

As a PG-13 rated vampire movie, "Nightlife" doesn't have a lot of blood, and its comedy is subdued enough to cause the drama to be slightly more serious than it should be. Glenn Shadix from "Beetlejuice" (1988) turns up as an unnamed vampire, Camille Saviola gives an over-the-top performance as Angelique's maid Rosa Mercedes, and there are a couple of witty lines, but there's nothing which will make anyone laugh out loud. I think the lack of comedy works in this movie's favour, however, and makes it a lot more palatable for those of us who don't like horror-comedies.

There's not much else to say about "Nightlife" other than it was filmed on location in Mexico City. It doesn't have many sets (and the few it does have are a bit sparse), some of the camerawork is dodgy, and the "I Put a Spell on You" song by Jay Hawkins is overused. Apart from those minor quibbles, it's fine.

With my rose-tinted glasses of nostalgia firmly in place, I'm going to rate "Nightlife' slightly higher than most people would. "Nightlife" was one of the first vampire movies which I reviewed for a magazine many years ago, and I've enjoyed it watching it again.

American Mary (2012)

"The story follows medical student, Mary Mason, as she becomes increasingly broke and disenchanted with the surgical world she once admired. The allure of easy money sends Mary into the world of underground surgeries which ends up leaving more marks on her than her so called 'freakish' clientele."

If you watch a lot of horror movies, you'll already know that originality is not their strong point. Even without the blatant ripoffs and clones, the homages and formulas have become de rigueur in the genre. Thus, it comes as no great surprise that Jen and Sylvia Soska's "American Mary", in spite of aiming to be more than a horror movie, is hardly the most original story either.

What lifts "American Mary" out of the ordinary is the fantastic performance by Katharine Isabelle who you'd be forgiven for thinking hasn't really done a lot apart from bit parts since "Ginger Snaps". Maybe it's because she refuses to get naked (which is a shame). As Mary Mason, she provides a multi-faceted character who adds more charisma than the Soska sisters could possibly have imagined in their hastily cobbled together screenplay. This isn't a dig at the Soska sisters, who are currently milking their 15 minutes of fame for all that it's worth (just as any of us would), but a statement of fact in praise of Katharine Isabelle's talents. If you hire such a beautiful actress and let her make the part her own, the task of creating a decent film is 90% done for you no matter how simple and derivative your story may be.

Mary Mason isn't the most likeable heroine though. She either has a mild form of Asperger's syndrome or she's a ruthless psychopath just waiting for something to set her off. Mary's narcissism is a huge indication of the latter. Arguably, the Soskas barely tried to write more into her since any attempts to view Mary as the empowered feminist horror icon of their promotional Q & A sessions are dashed by inconsistencies. As far as horror movie anti-heroes go, "Bloody Mary" certainly has a place alongside Patrick Bateman since both are victims even when they think they're winning, but to read any more into her than that would be silly. Maybe that's why the movie is called "American Mary". I'm still not sure about that detail though, and I've digressed.

A British horror-loving friend of mine on Twitter recently described "American Mary" as a lot of style over substance. Not being mean, but it's actually less than that if you deconstruct it. "American Mary" is a film which relies heavily on Katharine Isabelle's looks and some very neat props from MastersFX to distract the viewer from the competent yet rather ordinary camerawork and thinnest of rape-revenge plots. While it's all very stylish and sexy, the journey from A to B is as predictable as they come with more than a few nods to the movies which inspired it.

Without spoiling it too much for you, "American Mary" can be described as a hybrid of "Boxing Helena", "Hard Candy", "I Spit on Your Grave", the "Nip/Tuck" TV series, and dozens of grittier Hallmark channel movies. Specifically, if you've ever wondered what "Nip/Tuck" might have turned into with another season which focused on nothing but "extreme body modification", "American Mary" is the answer. It has to be said, however, that "Nip/Tuck" covered the same ground several times anyway with just as much blood and gore.

Canadians have always been great "copyists" when it comes to horror movies. As derogatory as it sounds, there's also a compliment buried in there. Even going back to "Ginger Snaps" (which is merely "The Wolf Man" with the genders and ages of the protagonists changed), there's never been a completely original idea from any of Canada's filmmakers except (perhaps) David Cronenberg. Ironically, "American Mary" owes a lot to Cronenberg, but not entirely in a good way. As someone who isn't the greatest fan of his work other than "The Fly" remake, I would call many of his "body horror" movies "style over substance" too.

Unlike David Cronenberg's early movies, "American Mary" looks great. Money clearly goes further when shooting in Vancouver with an ensemble cast of TV actors although (without knowing the exact figures) I'd guess that the Soskas finagled a substantial amount of investment. The last thing you can fault "American Mary" for is being some kind of low-budget "indie" dreck because the production values are very good indeed. Despite taking only 15 days to shoot, this isn't the product of some beered-up, redneck friends in their backyard with a couple of Jazz cams. Professionals were involved in this every step of the way, and it shows.

I wish one of this team of veterans had spoken up about the contrived, downbeat and very disappointing ending which feels like a cheat, but at the end of the day, it's the directors' decision. There are so many ways that the story could have gone to make it more satisfying, but I think the Soska sisters chose the wrong one. Watching the movie again reveals the placement of enough warning signs for the more observant viewer to guess that things are inevitably going to end very badly yet not exactly how. On the plus side, there won't be a sequel. I think we've all had enough of sequelitis to last us several lifetimes, so thanks for that.

Having seen their previous movie, "Dead Hooker in a Trunk" (2009), and noted their own lack of acting skills, I don't think that the Soskas are worthy of the overpraise being heaped upon them at conventions. Nobody is. Generally speaking, horror convention people are mostly sycophantic assholes with their own agendas so you can't trust them any more than a crow with a beak full of cheese should believe the compliments of a fox. While I would like to say that Jen and Sylvia seem to know their stuff when it comes to characterisation, storytelling and pacing, their various interviews give away that the actors themselves worked with them to get things right. In many ways, this flexibility is to be applauded, but in others, it reeks of inexperience and makes me wonder if they'll ever get this lucky again.

The Soskas seem like a nice enough pair and I wish them the best. I also sincerely hope that they make more movies, but unless they continue to employ Katharine Isabelle as eyecandy and muse, it's unlikely that they will become a major force in the horror industry. Realistically, if Lucky McKee and Angela Bettis can't make it, what chance have they got? Even if they don't get any further, "American Mary" is still a solid (but not groundbreaking or innovative) genre entry and one which I highly recommend to fans of Katharine Isabelle everywhere.

It may have nothing new to offer except as a means to ogle Katharine Isabelle looking sexier than she ever has before, but that's still reason enough for "American Mary" to earn a place in the "Video Vault". Yes, I'm a pervert and a hypocrite, get over it.

Doctor Blood's Coffin (1961)

"People are mysteriously disappearing near a remote Cornish village, where a scientist is experimenting with reviving the dead."

Since it was 18 years ago today that I first named my video review column in "The Demeter" magazine after a movie which I had never actually seen at the time, I decided to watch a remastered version of "Doctor Blood's Coffin".

There are two things which I have to get out of the way before I begin my review. The most important of these is to tell you that, in spite of the name, "Doctor Blood's Coffin" isn't a vampire movie. Yes, I did feel rather silly when I found out. I was writing my first published reviews for a Dracula magazine back in the day but nobody else realised my mistake either.

The second thing is that when I first watched "Doctor Blood's Coffin" on television in the late '90s, I thought it was horribly dated and boring. I didn't even make it to the end. Like a lot of younger reviewers nowadays, I only wanted the latest thing and had yet to develop any real taste or discernment.

"Doctor Blood's Coffin" has one of those somewhat embarrassing titles which would make you believe that it was yet another of those "cheesy" (I loathe the use of that word, by the way), over-the-top, campy horrors which today's hipsters like to get off on because they think it's "so bad, it's good". Fortunately, for me, although some of the acting is a little bit clumsy, the film is way more intelligent than the crapfest which it could have been.

The big draw here for movie lovers of the time is Kieron Moore who plays one of the two "Dr Blood" characters in the story. As Peter Blood, he is the younger, handsome, research scientist son of Ian Hunter's Robert Blood.

Kieron Moore was a very recognisable face during the '50s and '60s although his acting style was always rather more shouty than subdued. If you think of him as a constantly smoking prototype of Brian Blessed but without the beard and with an Irish accent which sounds German then you won't go far wrong.

The other even bigger draw for horror fans in particular is the late Hazel Court who plays Nurse Linda Parker. Hazel Court was one of the most beautiful of Hammer's horror actresses and was previously known for her role alongside Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee in "The Curse of Frankenstein" (1957). It's ironic (and probably no coincidence) that "Doctor Blood's Coffin" is, basically, another Frankenstein subgenre story.

One thing which I find fascinating (and here I'm going to get a bit spoilery even though the trailer gives it away) is how "Doctor Blood's Coffin" deals with the subject of human heart transplants six years before the first successful one was achieved by Christiaan Barnard in 1967.

There's a lot of outright moral condemnation of the whole organ donor thing here especially as Peter Blood comes across as quite a psychopathic bad guy and none of the donors are willing. There's even a big argument between Dr Blood and his nurse later in the film which doesn't present his case in a very good light at all although both sides of the case are treated somewhat childishly and it's hard to tell who was more insane.

The style of the film is very Hammer-esque but is nothing to do with them. The location filming really was done in Cornwall rather than the Bray Studios version as in "The Reptile" (1966). What horror directors had against Cornwall, I have no idea. It's hardly the most desolate place on the planet. The trope goes back to "The Uninvited" (1944) and is a bit like how New York city people think that anything upstate is all farms.

Another thing which stands out for me is the love the cameraman must have had for the old cars. I'm not entirely sure but I think at least one of them is a Hilman. There's definitely a Wolseley and a Ford Zodiac in here too. You can see them on the IMCDb (yes, an "Internet Movie Cars Database" really exists). As I grew up in the '70s and most of these cars were still going strong back then, it's a nice nostalgic moment.

Of course, what you really want to know about is whether or not "Doctor Blood's Coffin" is gory or scary. Well, it's definitely gory in a couple of places and, if you are the right age, the last ten minutes could be quite scary. I think it's more of an intriguing serial killer kind of thriller until the story really jumps the shark at the end. It would probably have been a minor classic if it hadn't gone so bizarrely into the absurd.

I don't want to give a major spoiler about the ending, but I will say that it isn't how anyone with a brain would expect this film to end. Of course, the producers were counting on that shock factor to get bums on seats in the cinema, but it's too unrealistic and doesn't make a whole lot of sense.

If it wasn't for the last ten minutes, "Doctor Blood's Coffin" would get at least a 7 out of 10 rating. The trouble is that those last ten minutes put the movie in a whole other category, and so it only gets a 6 out of 10 from me.